Sissy motivation tasks4/23/2024 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Adopting a similar attitude yourself underscores your relative positions of mistress and maid, whether a maternally effusive “Good boy! Haven't you done well?” or a more curt “That's another job you've done well, Maid!”. Throughout his life, your husband will have received praise from his superiors, starting with parents and teachers, then continuing with his manager or boss. The same is true should you wish to tighten your standards, doing so often needing only gentle nudges. Adding a new chore to his repertoire can thus be a collaborative affair, albeit one in which you do no more than steer him in the right direction while he puts in the necessary elbow grease. Rather than criticising him for something he hasn't done, you're suggesting what he's about to do, allowing him to follow your lead when he isn't sure while still letting him feel pride about what he does know. If you're watching your husband work, you can have him give you a running commentary as he goes along, prompting him with periodic questions with the aim of drawing his attention to important details while simultaneously helping him see how much he has mastered. Indeed, it's better that you don't, laughing off any lapse in favour of your intended praise - you can always correct him subsequently should he persist. Conversely, he may keep it to himself, but either way, his conscience will demand that he do better next time, without you having to say anything more. ![]() If there's something he secretly knows he should have done better, such a casual enquiry may yield a sheepish admission or perhaps a guilty protest, even if his shortcoming hadn't caught your eye. He'll be less tempted to cut corners when he's been recently reminded of how happy his hard work makes you, instead striving to earn further praise. This is especially effective when he's moved on to something else, with a smile enough to encourage him in that task too. You can also ask your husband about chores you already know he's completed, expressing your pleasure when he confirms that he has indeed done them. “Let's just straighten this out a little, and then you're done!”, you can propose cheerfully, going on to give him a hug for being so wonderful. You might not even have to say anything for him to do that himself next time, but it doesn't take much to hint at your preferences without appearing to be critical. Alternatively, you might choose to pick up on a small detail that you hadn't previously mentioned, however obvious it might be - “And you've hung the tea towel to dry too! You are getting the hang of this!”, you can tell him, even as you straighten the towel in question the way you'd rather it be. That might mean highlighting part of what you asked your husband to do, making it seem as though he's chosen to go the extra mile of his own accord - for example, “You've even done the glasses! Look at how they sparkle!”. A loving mother makes a big deal about her child tying their shoelaces for the very first time, even though she wouldn't think twice about fastening her own - similarly, a man who's still finding his feet in unfamiliar territory should be praised whenever he advances even slightly, regardless of how small his baby steps might be.Ī simple “Well done!”, an affectionate ruffle of his hair or a loving kiss on his cheek can be enough to signal your satisfaction, but it's worth taking a moment to find something more specific to comment if you can. It doesn't matter if you subsequently have to redo most of what he's done yourself, so long as there's something that can be built on, with a little appreciation going a long way towards encouraging him to try harder to please. No matter how hopeless your husband may be, there's sure to be something that warrants your praise - even if that's simply the fact that he's made an effort on your behalf. To start with, therefore, you should aim to motivate your fledgling maid more positively, drawing attention to those aspects of his behaviour that you'd like to see more of rather than those you don't. He won't want to go anywhere near an apron if wearing one only means he's going to get grief, preferring to protest about putting it on rather than suffer the inevitable criticism as he struggles his way through the chores. When you're trying to encourage your husband to help around the house, the last thing you want is to for him to come to associate being your maid with being scolded, something that's dangerously easy should you find fault with everything he does. If you've ever nagged your husband about tidying up after himself to no avail, you'll know how difficult it can be to make desired behaviour stick through doing so - while he might reluctantly comply to get you off his back, you'll most likely to have to nag him again the next time. ![]()
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